The call rang through the house.

"Daddy!  Daddy!"

It was Smartypants, age 5, beckoning from an upstairs bathroom.

"Daddy, I need more toilet paper."

And so Daddy fetched a new roll of toilet paper and delivered it to the bathroom.

"Thanks, Daddy."  Smartypants smiled faintly, seemingly concerned, but she took the toilet paper and finished her business.  When she stood, she stared as though puzzled at the unflushed toilet.

"What's wrong," Daddy asked from the hallway.  "Flush the toilet."

"But there's a problem."

"What's that?"

"There's toilet paper in the toilet."

"That's because you went to the bathroom."

"Not that toilet paper."

Confused, Daddy stepped closer to look, and there bobbing in the toilet water was an entire roll of toilet paper.  As each moment passed, it grew bigger, the double ply sheets absorbing water faster than any 'quicker-picker-upper' might dare.

"Why is that there?" Daddy asked calmly.

Smartypants' answer:  "I dropped it."


"While going to the bathroom."

"How did it get into the toilet while you were sitting on it?"

"It fell behind me."

"But you were ON the toilet!"

And she looked up with her sincere face, beaming with that innocent honesty and analytical curiosity she's managed to perfect at such a young age, and she said, "But I'm really not very big, Daddy. It just fell in. I don't know how.  Pretty yucky, huh?"


Sign in or Subscribe to join the conversation.
Enter your email below to get a log in link.